Simple Abundance

It’s 2:45 a.m. and I’m awake – so very awake.  This happens frequently when SB is out of town and let’s just say I’ll be glad when he gets home so I can go back to nights of peaceful, easy feelings.  You know the kind of feelings like resting your head on a cool pillow.  Drifting off to sleep and you twitch a little bit but then go immediately into a deeper sleep.  Or waking up at 12:30 a.m., looking at the clock, thinking it must be time to get up soon and realizing you have several more hours of sleep. 

I long for those times again. But that’s not why I’m writing.

So I’ve been thinking HARD this week (scary, I know).  But I thought I’d wrap up the week with a few things that have impacted me in the last seven days – things I’m most thankful for.  Because it’s always better to dwell well in the spirit of blessings.

1.  The blessing of closed doors.  I’m waiting on a window to open now, which causes me to look Up.

2.  Discovering new music.

3.  Grand and Lori Belle and their words of encouragement.

4.  Finding out my book has touched another life.

5.  A Butterball turkey.

6. The wind.

7. Wet kisses and warm snuggles from Sadie and Lily.

8. Freedom.

9.  The Word of God and the Truth it brings.

10. My health.

11. A kind note.

12. The opportunity to lay low for awhile.

13. Sitting down at the piano and remembering what it’s like to play.

14. A Chai Tea Latte. (not sure if Chai tea is decaffeinated, so I have to drink these in moderation, but I’d recommend you RUN to your favorite coffee shop to try this).  It’s made my whole week.

So what are you most thankful for? It’s the simple things in life that matter most. So share if you wish. You might encourage someone else to focus on life through a telescope rather than a microscope.

I have been wrung out

Psalm 126 (The Message)

A Pilgrim Song

 1-3 It seemed like a dream, too good to be true, when God returned Zion’s exiles.
   We laughed, we sang,
      we couldn’t believe our good fortune.
   We were the talk of the nations—
      ”God was wonderful to them!”
   God was wonderful to us;
      we are one happy people.

 4-6 And now, God, do it again—
      bring rains to our drought-stricken lives
   So those who planted their crops in despair
      will shout hurrahs at the harvest,
   So those who went off with heavy hearts
      will come home laughing, with armloads of blessing.

In some of my posts I have written about and eluded to a season of life and learning I find myself in right now. It’s often been a time of trial and error, and dare I say trying to pry open doors that have been shut and sealed!  I know, I’m hard-headed and have to learn lessons – sometimes over and over before I really GET IT!Is it just me? I don’t think so. 

This morning I threw a load of laundry in the washing machine. It consisted of a sheet, a small blanket and a few odds and ends of whites. I know better because my washer has become a little less tolerant in its old age.  It doesn’t take much for it to get off balance and start that knocking and jumping and I’m forced to go leaping over furniture in .08 milliseconds to get to the thing and rearrange the wet and heavy items.  I usually stand over the machine for a minute to make sure I repositioned everything just so and that I won’t have to dig the washer out of the wall across the laundry room.  It’s a relief when the thing quits spinning and I can actually put them in the dryer! Whew – a workout of all work outs once it’s all said and done.

More than anything I want my life to purposeful and intentional. So it surprises me when I find myself being tempted off-course and I actually jump head first into the washing machine of life – as if by some miracle – when the cycle stops, I will be noticeably cleaner and brighter.  But lately, I’ve loaded my life with situations and people who don’t belong in this cycle with me.  And I’ve been whirled and twirled and turned upside down – knocked around too.

And I’m ready for the ride to stop. I’m tired of being wrung out by my hair. I want to be able to twirl around in the grace of God and sling all the mud off myself instead of being in the world’s washer. I want to pick my feet up out of the mudholes I walk into sometimes and be rinsed off by the softness of the waterhose and gently put myself in the sun Son to dry.  And I’ve learned to be cautious about ever proclaiming that “I want to be normal” because I truly know that in this life there is no normal.

As someone once told me, “normal” is just a setting on the dryer.

Mighty Mole

A couple of years ago my neighbor and good friend D (whose kids we adore) mentioned to me they were having problems with a mole or moles in their yard. I don’t remember much more of the conversation because it was approximately 5:54 in the morning on our walk, and I’m sure I was thinking about something else like a warm cup of coffee or my warm shower.  I’m sure she probably mentioned their plan of attack of how they were going to rid their yard of such nuisance…aka…turn their cats out on them.  But I’m not sure. I should have listened better.

I do remember her joking about sending them over our way because I was practically glowing with pride at how we’ve managed to stay “mole free” for over 8 years we’ve lived in the Five Acre Woods.  In fact, I’ve never even seen a snake - thanks to the execptional prowess of Casper, their glow-in-the-dark white cat!  We did find a snake skin under a wood pile in our backyard last summer.  I didn’t stick around long enough to find out if it was poisonous or just a “chicken snake”.  If you ask me, snakes CAN’T be chicken.  They’re too slimy and sneaky… and well… they’re just snakey….ewwwwww.

So anyway, a couple of months ago, you can imagine my horror when I was out playing with the furry angels and noticed a series of tunnels through my yard.  I began marching up and down the yard stomping what little grass I have back into ground.  I even stuck a stone in the apparent entry hole I found.  That will teach him!

And after eleven forty days of stomping, I started investigating ways to rid one’s yard of moles. And people, let me tell you – there’s NO EASY WAY TO DO THIS! I have no desire to trap the little sucker because well, what in the sam hill would I do with it once I caught it? Send it back over to D’s house? I don’t think so.

Can’t poison the little thing because…hello? I have 2 wonderful, precious, adorable, fun, beautiful Labs who frolic in my yard and I don’t want them suctioning up anything that “may or may not be involved with a dangerous criminal.”  So we’ve just resigned ourselves to the “stomping of the mole divets” sometimes twice a day!  Mighty mole is mighty busy and I’m about sick of it!  Seriously, don’t they hibernate or something like that during the winter?

The only hope I have at this point came this morning when I was walking Sadie down the driveway. Once I got down toward the ditch I noticed the little digger had somehow made his way down by our ditch. Praise the Lord! I’m hopeful he’s munched up whatever it is they munch on in our yard and has decided to take his family and be like George and Weezie – “we’re moving on up” – and that he gets his little mighty mole self out of my yard.

Otherwise, if he sticks around that part of our property too long the owls are likely to swoop down on him and well…that’s something I wouldn’t mind seeing.  Bye bye Mighty Mole. Your days are numbered!

When it RAINS, it POURS

I started this blog on Saturday but has taken me a few days to find the charger to my camera so I can post these pictures!!!  So pretend you read this Saturday!

OK. Let me just preface this blog with the fact that I’m not a natural cynic. I pretty much can find the bright side of life and find positive bits of encouragement in most discouraging situations.  But last night, I fell into a pit of self-pity.  And I had me a fit of hysteria. And tears. And panic.  But somehow got by with a little help from my friends: Ann, Arma, Kim, and Pinot Noir. In that order.

But it took some digging deep because I’ve been walking a thin line lately between hope and reality. In my previous entry When He Reigns, He Pours, I was feeling a lot more optimistic and stronger in my faith. Yesterday at exactly 4:32 p.m. I got an answer to my petition but it wasn’t necessarily the answer I had been praying for.  I mean, I had honestly been praying for the Lord’s will, not mine, but still hoping that things would go my way.  And in all honesty, I am having to defer to God, because well, I’ve been known to mess things up a little if left to my own decisions.

But I digress from the point of the matter.  While we were waiting for the yummy Vidalia Onion & Cheese Dip to warm in the oven, we heard this REALLY strange noise in the kitchen. It actually sounded like a gas burner doing its click, click, clicking, but since I don’t have a gas stove, I knew something was amiss. I walked into the kitchen and over to the oven and while I was standing there with my hands on my hips, thinking “WHAT is that noise?”, a splat of whatever hit my head.  I turned my head up and… SPLAT – right between the eyes. Water was coming through the vent in the ceiling.  Did I mention it was raining outside?

So I did what anyone whose husand is in remote Montana would do. I called him… and actually got him on the cell phone.  Here’s how the conversation went:

K:  Um, well, I think we have a leak in the roof. There’s water pouring out of the vent in the kitchen.

SB: Um, well, there’s not a form thing I can do about it right now. (It obviously wasn’t as high on the priority list as dragging a mule deer across the prairie land. Hmmm.)  If it comes busting through the whole ceiling, I can’t do a thing about it right now!

K:  Maybe you didn’t understand me.  THERE IS WATER POURING INTO THE KITCHEN.  ALL OVER THE FLOOR. AND IT’S RAINING.  Who do you want me to call?

SB:  I’m sure that means it’s leaking all the way through the attic. (I married a genius!)

K: I’m pretty sure that it had to come through the attic to get to the vent, SB.

SB:  Well, call Don and get them to come out next week.

Whew. I’m glad he cleared that up for me. Because you know, I don’t think this adds much to kitchen decor:

I really am beginning to feel like the Morton’s Salt girl. 

 

And this time I’m ready, you know, in case it comes busting through the whole ceiling.

When He Reigns, He Pours

“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever…” Psalm 138:8

I am waiting in anticipation of God this morning.  No, I’m not wanting to take over his job of orchestrating my life. Been there. Done that.

What I mean is simply that I’m navigating the waters of waiting on Him for a particular petition in my life. For most of 2008, I’ve been holding onto the edges of what I call a little bitty fishing boat in the enormous sea of life…some days it’s felt more like I’m bobbing up and down in the ocean with nothing more than a life jacket to keep me from drowning.  But nonetheless, I’m still holding on.

In actuality, the last 5 years of my life have been nothing short of amazing. In fact, I would venture to say they’ve been the most poignant growing years of my entire life. From the heartwrenching loss of our baby to surviving cancer to making a major career decision that has changed everything about me to gaining new friendships and nurturing old friendships…in some respects, my heart has been hemmed with every stitch of raw emotions we as humans face.

So this morning…this day… as I sit in anticipation of what the King has for his Daughter, I’ve been reminded in scripture that waiting patiently for Him is indeed action.  And when we allow Him, and only Him to reign in us and over all things – no matter how great or how small – he will pour over us His living waters of blessing.  Drench me, please, Lord.  Just let me soak You in.

So, sign me up to be like the Morton’s Salt girl – all decked out in my raincoat, rubber boots, and umbrella. My new slogan for life: “When He Reigns, He Pours.”

“Pirates of the Pinzance”

There’s an unspoken joy about people who share in the gifts of 1) remembering lines from a favorite movie or two or three and 2) reciting those lines in any given moment of life’s bounty, and 3) it’s even better when you’re together and you both just bust out with the same line and the same time for the perfect occasion.

I have two people in my life who share an appreciation for and an art for being available for quoting movie lines from two of the all time greatest chick flicks: Steel Magnolias and Pretty Woman (whoop, whoop, whoop). So I want to give a shout out to Tater Mama and my mama for plenty of laughs, snorts, laughs at ourselves!

SB totally gets this about me and he’s even learned to keep his eyes from rolling too far up and back in his head when he walks through and either of said movies are on the tv for the 786th time – in the same weekend!  But I have to say, without my total dedication to memorizing those lines for such a time that dictates this necessity, I would have (and now you all would have) missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime to see it in real time.

Here’s the set up. We went to eat at a hibachi grill with some friends and outside the restaurant was a nice little water feature.  In a moment of complete humiliation to me, SB jumped up onto the water fountain to have his picture made and this is what I captured:

So when SB realized something had gone terribly wrong… oh so terribly wrong, he jumped off and you can see for yourself what one great movie line can do in a moment’s notice.  Everyone… say it with me:

 

“It was so good, I almost peed in my pants!”  I love my man. Truly, I do.

The first time ever I saw your face

Well, I’m cleaning out some computer files and of course, I got side-tracked by pictures of my 4-legged babies. They’ve grown up to be the best dogs in the whole world – except of course when they run off from me and when they eat things in the woods they’re not supposed to.  But those moments are few and far between.  Let me show you what I mean:

So – there you have them. My 2 girls in all their precociousness.  They bring us sheer delight, ya’ll. Because when I come home and have those 2 tails wagging at me and then they pile up in my lap when I sit down, life doesn’t get much better than that. It’s unconditional. It’s pure and true puppy love.

Finding Comfort

This morning when I got out of bed, I got down on my knees. It’s something I’ve been doing recently through a Beth Moore Bible study on the Psalms of Ascent. But today, I felt particularly drawn DOWN. I began my prayers with thanksgiving for another day and for another breath.  Sometimes it’s the more unaware things that are the most important.  Because today, in a world that will be laden with a lot of noise – news stories, the latest breaking news angle, “the day after” reports, the suppositions, the arrogance of some, the defeat of others, the unknown and unseen victims of our time, the heavy-hearted – I needed to be down before I could look up.

Before I began uttering a word to cry out to the Lord, a complete wave of grace and peace washed over my back.  I hope I am not alone in sharing this that I get all tingly sometimes when I pray. And I mean that in a literal sense. It’s like the Holy Spirit is hovering over me and I feel Him in a goose-bump way. Deeply in my heart, I know, He is much more than a moment of goose bumps, but today, I felt His presence over my life and my world.  And my prayer is that you have that same awareness.

No matter what struggles you are battling today: an angry co-worker, the loss of a loved one, the inability to conceive for the umpteenth time, your preferred candidate not winning, financial mountains, broken dreams, illness… no matter what – the God of all of that is our God of comfort and righteousness. He is in control of it all.

As I got up off the floor from my bedside in the darkness, I began to think of scriptures and this is the one that has been placed upon my heart today.  It’s one we all know and learned from the time we could recite things in Sunday School. It’s one we read at funerals. It’s one that David wrote in joyful trust in the Lord as his King.

So take heart, my friends… the Lord is still on His throne and He is the one in control of all things.

Psalm 23 (NIV)

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside quiet waters,

he restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of rightousness for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows,

Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

 So there you have it.  From the man after God’s own heart, David scribes a beautiful song for this moment in time, for this generation, for whatever hurts are blinding AND binding us. 

Take heart. Take comfort. The goose bumps feel so good sometimes.

Peace and grace to you today.

To Walk on Fertile Ground Winners

Thanks everyone – those who popped over from BooMama’s site, those who’ve been visiting me from the beginning, and those who just happened upon my site for one reason or the other. My first giveaway has been so fun and I thank you for all the precious comments.  There’s NO doubt in my mind that women who struggle with infertility are hungry for encouragement and hope.  My heart’s desire is that God uses my book to accomplish at least those two things.

If you are not one of the winners, I pray you will go here and order a book today for yourself or for the numerous friends and/or family members you told me about. I may be a little biased, since you know I did write the book, BUT if I had had this book when I was most struggling with my journey of infertility, it would have helped me immensely. 

Cindy, Paige M., and Carolyn Sharkas – you ARE the winners, please email me your mailing address, and to whom you would like me to autograph the book, and I’ll get them out in the mail to you right away.

 

Here are your random numbers:

35	26	17

Timestamp: 2008-11-05 01:49:32 UTC

 

Thanks, ya’ll, for joining my blog. I hope you’ll come back again and again and again!  Stay tuned for more bloggy thoughts for living life to the fullest!

I didn’t plan it but the celebration could be huge

When I set up my giveaway, I didn’t really pay attention to the fact that the closing date will be Election Day. So, now readers can not only vote for the next President and Vice President, they can also sign up for my bloggy giveaway.

I’ll be giving away 3 autographed copies of my recently published book, To Walk on Fertile Ground.  This is my testimony of faith through the pothole-filled road of infertility and surviving cancer.  And though many of you don’t even know me personally, by reading this book, you will get a bird’s eye view into my life and heart!

So if you haven’t already, go here and sign up to be in the random drawing.  You never know – the whole country could be celebrating with you!